what a long strange trip it's been, with still so many roads yet to travel
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........“psykonaut.”....... .
..........הֵילֵל......
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a realization that the world has more roots to you than it seems, and connection doesn’t necessarily have to be connected. Even though that connection to the world does not always seem fair, or logical in our eyes. A “………” is someone who keeps in mind the perspective of all the irrationalities in the world, and searches for personal peace amongst the unfairness of being alive.
"the fact there is night, gives value to the day"
I mean in a sense of doing anything, debating anything always comes down to the question of why, where if the question is answered and responded with “why” again, it always seems to end in nothing, or “because.” I think this is maybe one of the bigger differences in mental thought processes between someone depressed and someone not. The person suffering from a lack of value may not realize that their efforts were already insignificant if time’s value is weighed by the entirety of all humanity and not just the individual. But then again, what really makes anything worth doing? A "conqueror of worlds" is the same kind person as a "civil servant" as long as they are both conscious of themselves, and the potential that is in them. Even though their day to day activities may seem quite different, they are the same but just in their own universe that has its own unique successes and failures. The only difference between the two beings is when the moment where the conqueror realizes their potential they try to pursue it, attempting to make them aware of it constantly. But what may “lack” with the civil servant is that upon this realization its taken for what it is and then saved for a later nostalgia instead of living, or pursuing it. Now that doesn't make either decision wrong or one better than the other, the civil servant is not anything less of the conqueror just because they aren’t chasing something constantly. Their universe and the things they’ve defined as significant inside of it, is just different from that of the conqueror but that doesn't make it any better or any worse. A world is a world, and no one is the same, even if we share the same planet. Nostalgia made it a memory, consciousness made it real. In this world we all make a choice in what we want to do, and the one thing that matters in that choice is that we are satisfied with what we’ve done & what came from it. Regardless of how far it went, or how far we take it.
But see, it's the grandeur that is time that interests me the most. We are all an "hourglass" trickling out our own “sand of time” that allows us to live this world, without any instructions and nothing but ourselves. We still have to define our universe, growing up, learning from experiences good and bad to try and make sense of this world, give it our own personal definition. A society is one because within their region they assume similar experiences as individuals that ties them together as a whole. Whether that be, crime in one area so you watch your back all the time, or where wealth prospered and so you lived without fear, a set of values to live by defined by experience. But people seem to get into the habit of living before they ever get into the habit of thinking. Whilst defining our world, growing into it, we become the series of patterns that we deem essential to living. A person goes to work everyday during the week with the idea that their sacrifice of time will give them happiness from the money they collect from said job. But in the moment where something may go wrong in his world, then the thought of why comes into play. Not to debate the purpose for they understands why they're there, but instead it's weighed out if it is even worth it. The time spent, the time that will be spent, is that what they want? Is that enough to satisfy them in this world? We become accustomed so quickly to the aspects that lead us to our dreams so much so that the means feel like the end. A real world example would be with the problem of jobs after the pandemic started. Workplaces were moved out of public areas and back to the comfortable space of the individual. But now that things are slowing down with covid, filling those spots and going back to work will be much harder for awhile since the mentality that has been growing for years to push people to strive for these “jobs” suddenly broke. Now we live in a time period where ideas can be exchanged instantenously without ever leaving the comfort of their homes. And these people, left alone to be humans for a year, doing things for themselves instead of doing them because they feel they have to. And maybe in some of these people they realized from the perspective that the sacrifice of traditional employment is not the reason why we are alive, and it is not essential to stay alive. “I see humans, but rarely humanity.” This is where that idea of 'do what you love so you’ll never work a day in your life comes from.’ We as creatures are our passions, and the way we apply them in our day to day gives meaning to our existence. Some people may say there is nothing they are passionate about, and this I feel this can maybe stem from two reasons; One, whilst growing and defining their world, they did so to fit instead of find. Something along the way stood out to them, caught their eye and wished for service from them, and in doing so they felt joy in a sense of completion. But our world today doesn’t deem all things essential with the value of work being defined by how it could be utilized by the eyes of another, and not solely based on the efforts of the creator. Some people make a life out of the most interesting of habits and become happy doing so, but not everyone is willing to take that chance to maybe find peace for themselves instead of following the ideas of another. Whether that be ties because of family, beliefs, or culture, it is an awkward mold to break and problems seem to always come with it. But a headstrong attitude needs to rationalize their perspective vs their environment’s, they have a dream of building something but do not make the mistake that all things just fall into place. If you wish to travel over water, then figure out what you need to build the boat to do so. Life is not some martyr conquest where every triumph or tribulation is valued by everyone, no. Value comes from success in execution and for this long strange trip, be smart and go into it equipped with what you need to be who you want to be.
I mean in a sense of doing anything, debating anything always comes down to the question of why, where if the question is answered and responded with “why” again, it always seems to end in nothing, or “because.” I think this is maybe one of the bigger differences in mental thought processes between someone depressed and someone not. The person suffering from a lack of value may not realize that their efforts were already insignificant if time’s value is weighed by the entirety of all humanity and not just the individual. But then again, what really makes anything worth doing? A "conqueror of worlds" is the same kind person as a "civil servant" as long as they are both conscious of themselves, and the potential that is in them. Even though their day to day activities may seem quite different, they are the same but just in their own universe that has its own unique successes and failures. The only difference between the two beings is when the moment where the conqueror realizes their potential they try to pursue it, attempting to make them aware of it constantly. But what may “lack” with the civil servant is that upon this realization its taken for what it is and then saved for a later nostalgia instead of living, or pursuing it. Now that doesn't make either decision wrong or one better than the other, the civil servant is not anything less of the conqueror just because they aren’t chasing something constantly. Their universe and the things they’ve defined as significant inside of it, is just different from that of the conqueror but that doesn't make it any better or any worse. A world is a world, and no one is the same, even if we share the same planet. Nostalgia made it a memory, consciousness made it real. In this world we all make a choice in what we want to do, and the one thing that matters in that choice is that we are satisfied with what we’ve done & what came from it. Regardless of how far it went, or how far we take it.
But see, it's the grandeur that is time that interests me the most. We are all an "hourglass" trickling out our own “sand of time” that allows us to live this world, without any instructions and nothing but ourselves. We still have to define our universe, growing up, learning from experiences good and bad to try and make sense of this world, give it our own personal definition. A society is one because within their region they assume similar experiences as individuals that ties them together as a whole. Whether that be, crime in one area so you watch your back all the time, or where wealth prospered and so you lived without fear, a set of values to live by defined by experience. But people seem to get into the habit of living before they ever get into the habit of thinking. Whilst defining our world, growing into it, we become the series of patterns that we deem essential to living. A person goes to work everyday during the week with the idea that their sacrifice of time will give them happiness from the money they collect from said job. But in the moment where something may go wrong in his world, then the thought of why comes into play. Not to debate the purpose for they understands why they're there, but instead it's weighed out if it is even worth it. The time spent, the time that will be spent, is that what they want? Is that enough to satisfy them in this world? We become accustomed so quickly to the aspects that lead us to our dreams so much so that the means feel like the end. A real world example would be with the problem of jobs after the pandemic started. Workplaces were moved out of public areas and back to the comfortable space of the individual. But now that things are slowing down with covid, filling those spots and going back to work will be much harder for awhile since the mentality that has been growing for years to push people to strive for these “jobs” suddenly broke. Now we live in a time period where ideas can be exchanged instantenously without ever leaving the comfort of their homes. And these people, left alone to be humans for a year, doing things for themselves instead of doing them because they feel they have to. And maybe in some of these people they realized from the perspective that the sacrifice of traditional employment is not the reason why we are alive, and it is not essential to stay alive. “I see humans, but rarely humanity.” This is where that idea of 'do what you love so you’ll never work a day in your life comes from.’ We as creatures are our passions, and the way we apply them in our day to day gives meaning to our existence. Some people may say there is nothing they are passionate about, and this I feel this can maybe stem from two reasons; One, whilst growing and defining their world, they did so to fit instead of find. Something along the way stood out to them, caught their eye and wished for service from them, and in doing so they felt joy in a sense of completion. But our world today doesn’t deem all things essential with the value of work being defined by how it could be utilized by the eyes of another, and not solely based on the efforts of the creator. Some people make a life out of the most interesting of habits and become happy doing so, but not everyone is willing to take that chance to maybe find peace for themselves instead of following the ideas of another. Whether that be ties because of family, beliefs, or culture, it is an awkward mold to break and problems seem to always come with it. But a headstrong attitude needs to rationalize their perspective vs their environment’s, they have a dream of building something but do not make the mistake that all things just fall into place. If you wish to travel over water, then figure out what you need to build the boat to do so. Life is not some martyr conquest where every triumph or tribulation is valued by everyone, no. Value comes from success in execution and for this long strange trip, be smart and go into it equipped with what you need to be who you want to be.
savoir faire
I think we don’t give our bad experiences some of the credit they deserve. My used to father would give me the example of how person who feels no pain in their body will never know if anything is wrong, and if they never know, how could they ever realize how to improve it or fix it? Physical danger allowed us as people to gain awareness of the world, and I believe that mental battlefields offer a similar gift. Instead of the physical awareness gained from danger, the metaphysical gifted us awareness to our own unique experience as a whole. Art is the details within an experience that have been magnified and then translated into common themes within our own world. And for an "artist," they know that their expression may just end up worthless. But if their work is unappreciated, then it will be a witness to their character and who they were as a person, or at best they leave a depiction of what they wished to bring to life. "An artist not to be known is the same as them never to create, and to not create is death to all the ideas and characters they would have brought to life." In the absence of this “.........” mentality, the gift of artistic expression is not there if there is not a burning passion of the question of “why?” But to confront that question it is met with uncomfortable thoughts of the universe and doubts of the validity of life itself. We’ve spent a good part of our lives running away and remaining silent, not to question the world but just go along with it. Until the "artist" breaks the mold and allows their questions to be answered by themselves in an expressive way that they choose, rather than what was normalized or easy in their world. But rarely this kind of realization comes from anything but a tragedy in a .........’s life. It's painful for me to think about the people in this world who suffer mental obstacles daily dragging them down with the fear that nothing ever gets better, and that some of them will never realize the gift of expression that they have, the golden soul that's been put inside them, and the fact that the conqueror within them, just needs a little room to breathe and to spread its wings. I say that nobody is better than anybody and nobody is worse either. Whether it is being virtuous in the eyes of the law, or in the eyes of themselves, there is honor amongst thieves and one can be virtuous through a fault. But for the people who feel a suffering, they are granted an opportunity of the gift of perspective. A perspective of their world, and the way others view theirs. I want to be clear that just because someone is suffering, does not mean they are gifted. And this gift of expression is not freedom of mental conflict but instead, a way of giving new meaning to their experience with a phrase that ends in … “All is well.” It's the realization that the ......... is still bound to a physical world but is in fact the master of it themselves. We create our own opportunities with everything that is permitted to us, keep in mind the fact that is everything permitted does not mean that nothing is forbidden. We create our own morals that align with the peace we feel inwards and it's up to us to choose the right middle path between godliness in light, and idols in the dirt. We’ve felt the walls that bind us to our physical world but we .........s are completely aware of our boundaries to the maximum in the aspects of liberation, evolution, knowledge, and strength. We live to flourish within our walls making it our canvas, and never our cage. This is a state where lucidity topples curiosity, and from this realization ideas of revolution, freedom, and passion are born with the refusal of suicide, and the acceptance of life. But within our walls, it's difficult to reach that acceptance of never understanding a purpose for our time spent here. It's very ironic that the only thing that really can free a person and allow them to live to their maximum, also can pulverize their spirit. It's with this I believe the people that feel a sense of no connection to this world, may just need some tools for their sandbox, and a reinforced thought of “this is yours, and all for you.”
I used the word “artist” above and I want to clarify what kind of artist I am describing here. It's not always a person with a paintbrush making watercolor clouds, but it's any person that realizes an idea and gives themselves a canvas to express it. Whether it be literally a canvas, or singing on a mic, decorating a house, trimming a bush, steering a boat, it is anything where the individual finds a way to express themselves. An "artist" is anyone who does expression for themselves, or for the enjoyment of themselves. I find “artist” has a connotation of a person who discovers genius in expression but I’m not impressed with the word genius as much as I am with the word intelligence. I believe genius to be strictly an aspect of thought where intelligence is execution. An idea that is truly original is probably impossible because how sure are you that you were the first person to at least think it? “To create is to live again, but to re-create is to face truths with a different appearance.” Humanity constantly improves by learning from the decisions of the ones before us, giving us guidance into what we want to be/do and what happens from certain reactions and variables. But it's the execution of the idea that gives itself its value! Intelligence defines boundaries and makes up the ideas for genius. And within these boundaries that the artist chooses to express, it gives life to their consciousness and definition to their adventures. We examine our world, enlarge it, enrich it, and call it our home. And the "artist", in their love for expression, puts their work on display so another may relate to it. Not everyone is in search of the question “why” and most people don’t care to suffer through that question, but we are all aware of the suffering that is humanity. For the lucidity in the artist is praised as strength for enduring their path of tragedy. And I know this “lucidity” in the mind of the artist is real since those who do endure such a path still relate to the passions that shine in the audience's hearts showing them that we are not so different, and they are not monsters for feeling the way they do.
I don’t really like the word “audience” in this context even though it's the best way to describe the receiving end of the artist. But the word audience sounds like a multitude of people and I am always talking about the individual. It would be safe to say if the artist creates because of their choice to experience, rather than explain and solve. But for the receiving end that prefers a life of explanation and solutions, they fit the definition of almost a philosopher. An artist places themselves in front of their work and makes it theirs, the philosopher is enclosed within a system and learns to become it and utilize it. But in spite of the philosophical differences between these two on their approach to life, they both exist in this world by commitment to their work fully, even if they do not realize. From the perspective as the audience watches the artist, a question sometimes arises as; “how do they know what to create if creation in art comes from nothing?” "Expression begins where thought ends, born from intelligence’s refusal to unify with the world and any thought that abandons unity, glorifies diversity and diversity is the home of art."
As for the ........., outside everything that is the deteriorating fate that is to be human, the realization of our world's absurdity can give us us liberty and for what is left of the world, we are its master. Before we became .........s, we were bound to this world by the illusion of another in regards to our reality. Whether it be the dreams of heaven on earth or in the skies, we believed in something later, not here and valued later more than now. The world pities those who do not occupy a physical house for it is deemed essential to living, yet the world doesn’t extend a similar pity to those who may live in a physical house, but never feel at home. They are the expressive voice that humanity neglects in its search to create a society, not an individual.
Silence after a question speaks loudly about its perspective. Everything is just that, perspective. The reasons for a laugh, the reasons why they cried and the empathy you feel to relay compassion is decided by how you choose to place their perspective with your own definitions. Please be mindful, please be courteous. Value does not have to have to validate itself with everything and everyone, but if there is one who feels its value, then it is valuable. Nothing is too small or too big as long as it matters to someone.
savoir vivre
-josiah "Jash" jackson :)